Mapping the world
Are you aware that a seemingly random action could bring you closer to coming into wholeness? Recently, I purchased a 2000 piece puzzle of the world map for my husband’s birthday. I had no idea that putting this puzzle together would cause me to reflect deeply on my own journey through loss and grief, and in turn allow myself to honour each piece of my healing, bringing me closer to remembering and finding my wholeness.
Dismemberment and Remembrance
Building the puzzle, I reflected on my own path of dismemberment and remembrance. The trauma and loss I have experienced have often caused me to feel less than whole and often unworthy. Looking at the thousands of single puzzle pieces, the task ahead seemed impossible as we struggled to find any semblance of order. Where to start looking at all these dismembered pieces?
First, by trusting your guidance, you choose your starting point and that will ultimately lead you where you are going, travelling that path to wholeness. Second, what is important on our own healing journey is that we consciously decide to bring ourselves to that place of unity and remembrance. As we move forward, we trust that each piece will come to us in the right time so that we can integrate them into our being.
I decided to start with building the border of the puzzle. This is symbolic of our own healthy boundaries. Without healthy boundaries we cannot have healthy relationships. The outline of the puzzle was a great place to start, however even this was a difficult task. I recognize where I have built healthy boundaries in my life, and understand where not having them in place actually hurt me.
I built the upper and lower border, but building the sides was an even greater task. Perhaps this is similar to how I have managed my personal boundaries in the past, I barely had any…
Feeling frustrated, I moved on to build Canada, then the USA and South America. Slowly I pieced together the remaining boundaries as other pieces of the puzzle came together. My husband sifted through the pile of pieces and I would struggle to fit the pieces together. At times I would look at the overwhelming number of pieces and think this was an impossible task we would never be able to finish. Piece by piece, the world began to take form. Similarly, learning to place healthy personal boundaries has allowed me to change many patterns from the past, therefore creating the space for healthy relationships to find their place inside my world.
Victory is ours
As we neared the completion of the project, down to the last few pieces, we understood and celebrated the victory of finding each fitting piece. Alone, I would have had difficulty completing the puzzle. However, together we had the strength and stamina to allow each piece to find its place. This is much alike our own healing. We do not need to do this alone. Being able to share our journey, getting help when we need it, is a priceless and necessary gift to ourselves. Each encounter brings a new piece to light as all the separate, discarded or forgotten pieces become part of the whole.
My journey is similar in magnitude to this puzzle. I am often in a state of overwhelm seeing the number of loose pieces in my life. There were piles of unprocessed emotions and trauma everywhere I looked. But as each piece falls into place, healing progresses. It is at times a difficult and heart breaking journey, one of frustration and some of the hardest work I’ve faced. The thought of being completely whole again, and remembering exactly where I came from and why I’m here has brought more perspective, peace and contentment than I could have imagined. This journey is definitely not for the faint of heart, but worth every single step.
Coming into Wholeness
As I begin to remember who I am, finding each lost or forgotten piece of myself become even more tedious and yet incredibly fulfilling. Each piece is a victory. Each piece fills a space bringing me closer and closer to wholeness. Our journey on earth is fully designed for us to remember the love we are at our core, knowing we came from love and unity and that we will return to the same place at the end of our journey.